School Life

When I was studying my degree in USM, my course mate and I never spend much time together. As our hometowns are near to USM, we go home frequently every weekend. Every time we were just met in class, outside class for discussion and having our meal at the canteen. When I am pursuing my master degree, I meet some new friends who are not from my course. However, we spend much time together. We even cook in our rooms. Haha… Although we have limited utensil for cooking but we make use of everything. We wash, cut and cook together. We even create our new recipe – Tom Yam Porridge. This is a university life I have never been through. I feel warm in doing all the cooking things with them. After our meal, we even prepare rabina juice as dessert. Haha.. what an enjoyable life! When my friend’s car was dirty, we will carry some baskets of water to the car park and wash the car together. As the baskets of water were heavy, we help each other in carrying them. These are the meaningful things I have ever been through in my University life. They will leave me in my second semester. I am going to miss them a lot. Thanks guys for all the wonderful moments you gave me. Friendship Forever..:)

First Sem in USM

Pursuing master degree is not an easy job. We need to work harder than degree. A lot harder. I took a course which I m not good in but I m interested. It was hard, real hard. I can’t even understand what am I doing, I have no idea how to evaluate my research. Then only I realize how inadequate I am. Some of my course mates are part time student. They need to do double works. But they are able to handle and they did a good job. I was shame to be a full time student and I can’t even match them. From now on I need to work harder than everyone else. Thank to my friends who gave me support when I was down. Someone told me, “you move slow does not mean you can’t reach the point, you move fast does not mean you will reach the point.” Haha.. thanks Leong Fan, I will remember your quote.

My 2011 Birthday present

I am a person who knows the different between what we want and what we need. So, I will think twice before buying something. A few days ago, I saw a Tissot watch. It is very beautiful, elegant and expensive too. However, I never feel like owning it because I already have a Seiko watch which bought by my father few years ago. It was an expensive watch too. My parents know I like the new watch while they saw I putting it on. Actually I am just trying I did not mean to have it. My parents are the best parents in the world, so they plan to buy it for me secretly as next year birthday present. (Note: My birthday is on October). Haha.. still long away in the future. But my father let the cat out of the bag, as his is always acute. So, he brings me to the shop today, and wants me to have it. I refuse as it was too expensive, but I know my father very well. He will buy anything for us if he knows we like it. If we refuse to have it, he will get angry. Haha.. What a different and cute father right? He wants us to be happy but we don’t want to waste his money. This is what always bothering us. Hehe.. Anywhere, I got my watch today and they asked: “are you happy with your present?” I answered: “Of course. I am very happy.” Actually I feel heartache more than happy. But I will try be happy as I know what they did is for me to be happy. Dad, Mom.. I must have done something very good in my past life to have you both as my parents. I will do whatever I can to be your good daughter. I am sorry for letting you down most of the time. But I will be better.. Trust me…..

Angry and Sorry

Today I feel like getting out of the house, getting out of this family. I always feel that I m lucky to have such sweet family. But I feels different today. I m tired of my parents' style. They keep on blaming others for their unhappiness. They do not listen to my advices. I tried to consult them but I failed. Things changed and now I feel hard to communicate with them as we are in different area. I feel gloomy while my mom complain the same things to me again and agian, moreover she don't accept my advice. God, I am sorry. I know I should not behave in this way to my family. I m sorry for not patient enough. I am sorry for not caring enough. I am sorry for not loving enough. I am sorry..... But I can't control myself. Please forgive me......

Let it go

One thing that I am very sure about is, my dad is the best dad in the world. No one can even replace him. I am thankful and lucky enough to be his daughter. If i have next life, I wish to be his daughter again. My dad knows how to be a good dad but he does not know how to live happily. My dad has a working partner. What I can describe about his partner is, Superstition, Gossiper and Ridiculous. He does not attend any funeral as he worry that the dead will turn into a ghost and hunt him. Beside that, he rejected any foods or gifts given by people as he afraid that its contain black magic. Sometimes he will chat with God (He believe he is) and sometimes he will fight with the ghost and get "them" out from someone or somewhere. He even can predict my dad is going to blind after two years. His ignorance is driving my dad crazy. My dad get very angry and upset about him. My dad was not longer happy. Everyday my dad is thinking about what he had said and even trying to take revenge on him. My dad was losing his patient over him. We trying to pursue dad do not listen to his words but dad seems like holding it too tight and can't let it go. Dad, I just want to let you know that everyone responsible for their own happiness, no one can take it away unless they allowed to. Please just let it go and do not hold on to something that we cannot control. Let it go...

The Lake House

I watched "the lake house" today. The movie made me cry. Two people connect to each other in all the right places but at all the wrong times. Kate live in 2006 and Alex live in 2004. The time was the biggest separation between them. They love each other so much. But Kate decided to give up as she could not meet Alex in 2006. I started to cry when Kate notice that Alex was died in a car accident in 2005 and that's why she couldn't meet him in 2006. I was so touching. Can u imagine that you love someone so much but you are unable to touch, hold and hug him? How is your feeling when you know you both are separate by time not distance? I love this story. It made me feel pertaining and we was lucky to have someone we love besides us. keanu reeves and sandra bullock, I love you both... Nice movie.

Trap

I always feel like trapping in a cage. I was trying to escape but the cage seems to be too huge for me to get over it. Human like to complain and they also enjoying involve themselves in other people's stuff. They like to judge people based on their own opinion. No matter what others trying to do they want it to be in their ways. This is why i always feel like trapping. I was lock in the same cage with them. Any day, anytime I need to fulfill their opinion, following their ways. If not, I will going to be judge. I have to listen to thousand and thousand of judgments and their "correct" advice. I feel hopeless to escape, the harder I try the tougher I can escape. I don't know why.. but everything seems to hold me from leaving. I can't find the way for me to break out the cage... There must have some reasons...I guess....